The expert in anything was once a beginner


When Things get Tough the Tough eat Chocolate

§ Confessions of a chocolate-chomping teacher 

I never believed chocolate gives you pimples. 2015 is my year to prove it
Last September they sent me to teach in a mountain village: 54 km from home.
Since then, I've been commuting 4 times a week, sometimes 5.
The alarm clock at 5 am, insomnia, mountain roads with bends and curves, loud students, fatigue, temperature, hundreds of bucks on gasoline, fools overtaking you in tunnels or on a snowy bend, trucks slagging uphill at 30 km/h + rain, fog, cold, snow...
No way.
No way I could have made it without chocolate and be here to tell the tale.
110 km driving per day
440 km driving per week
1,760 km driving per month
15,840 kilometers by car in a school year

my consumption of chocolate skyrocketed
35 grams a day

210 grams per 6 days a week
840 grams per month
7,560 kg CHOCOLATE in a school year (of 9 months)

I ate it all guilt-free, with no extra fat or pimples
in front of the coffee vending machine some days ago a colleague told me of her new ice-cream maker; I was already revving when she added “I have to find some ice-cream recipes without cream and sugar, and I was thinking of coffee ice-cream”.

I just let it slide: I don't even remember my name before morning coffee, but I don't waste a look on coffee ice-cream.
Ditto for chocolate: I can't conceive the creation of the universe without chocolate, but chocolate cake and ice-cream give me no thrills.

I didn't like to discourage her, so I just ignored the remark. But now that I 'm thinking and writing about it I wonder: why the hell did she get a new flashy ice-cream maker, if she doesn't want to make good, creamy, yummy ice-cream?

a minute before the bell prompted us back to the classroom I took out a couple of "lifesaving chocolates"; Gobbling hers with a grimace the colleague told me she is a purist, and she would eat dark chocolate only - with minimum 70% cocoa, to be sure.
You should give it back then!” I thought to myself, but, nope, of course, too late, the chocolate was gone... And so were we, time's up and we had to slave away.

I'm positive an abyss separates us: I want my chocolate with hazelnuts - beautiful round and crispy. And all guilt-free.

kitkatcadburylindtnutellatoblerone .... Sounds like a mantra, doesn't it? Has anybody invented chocolate yoga anywhere close?

Luckily I'm not fat & alone - my husband, Tiziano, is a skinny gourmand and an accomplice in
tasty raids, although he, too, prefers dark chocolate.

Now it's June: it's warm and we eat less; of course that means less chocolate, too; anyhow, in recent months I noticed that if I eat my daily share at breakfast and
o n e little chocolate or praline at the morning coffee break, then I'm fine and I don't crave any more during the day.

Now it's June, and it'll be hot, soon: summer closets reopening means struggling with buttons and zippers, ..any distressing thought of the bikini test at the back of your mind yet?
...It's June, it's warm, September a distant memory, my nervous system's OK, and suddenly I wonder: how many megaton calories have I been gulping down with the hundreds ounces of chocolate I've been eating??

Sooner done than said: 100 grams of milk chocolate with hazelnuts contain 573
calories, informs me the first package at hand in my living-room. So here we go:

573 calories / 100 grams
5,730 calories per kilo
43,318.8 calories in a school year
=1,203.3 per week
=4,813.20 per month!

As you can see from these 2 pictures of mine, I got tired 
- from September to December -
and my face is plumper in the second picture -
but I had no pimples, and that was the hardest time at school:
the peak of dark days after sleepless nights after early mornings.

If I'm not mistaken, just by halving the chocolate and increasing the walks, my hips should get trimmer soon!
Luckily Tiziano and I are also sports people, we love long walks, swimming, snowshoeing, biking, so now in June's long days we can enjoy hikes in the fresh air on the hills near home before or after dinner, accompanied by singing blackbirds and immersed in the scent of flowers.

Tiziano and I are so hand in glove in our sweet and tasty love that we even made our wedding favours with little Nutella jars - “nutellini”, we call them.
Fancy the treat?

I'm positive I'm not the only shameless chocolate chomper on “the only planet with chocolate”, so how about you?
Have you ever calculated how many pounds of chocolate - or pizza, or any other “comfort food” you eat in a month - or a year – to sooth your soul?
Come on, don't be shy! Get your sarongs AND your skeletons out of the closet!